Storms
by anesor
Summary: Short Casavir story at the Old Owl Well. More a vignette to figure out some whys at his crossroads... OC/side story


Some of these characters aren't mine, but I, too, wish some of them were.

x x x

**Old Owl Well - - -**

_- - - Casavir_

As we returned to our hidden camp, I made sure my men cared for their gear before eating or resting. They knew so little, it was safer to keep reminding them, than risk faulty equipment in combat. Katriona would follow in a little while to verify their work.

I went to the case that we kept food in, below an overhang. We were running low on tubers and roots, I'd have to send Katriona to quietly buy some from Caleb. His not 'knowing' about us was the full extent of the city's support for us here. If I thought about it, I'd get angry again. So, instead, I concentrated on making a pot of stew, with deliberately blank thoughts.

By the time the water started to simmer, the wind picked up.

In the nearly two years I'd been here, the speed that storms would blow up out here still amazed me. I had grown up in the city, near the sea, where storms almost always came after a wave of humidity. In summer, the air could feel as wet and heavy as a wet towel, before and after a storm. Here, the wind would be bracing and the clouds would just roll across the sky.

I would indulge later.

I went around to inspect the men and give them some encouragement. I couldn't help them much with their own pains, but I could help them channel their fury for our mutual goal.

Most had settled in to doze, with none of the camp chatter that was once normal to me. Katriona took the first watch, while dinner cooked, so I made a circle around the camp.

Everything seemed well tonight, and I ended my path on a hilltop with a good view of the late day sky. The wind had picked up again, and I could smell the rain in the air. I knelt there, watching the storm roll in. The storm broke, and I was instantly drenched. I tilted my head back and spread my arms, pretending, for a moment, it could wash away my sins and make me feel worthy again.

Soon enough, the storm had passed, and I went back down to see if dinner survived. Katriona had put the lid on and was now relighting the fire with some drier wood and tinder.

"I regret I was distracted." No, that was not fair, try again. "I am sorry, it will not happen again."

She stated stonily, "You were on lookout, it was no trouble."

I never knew what caused her to come here. Something dire, by the hardened shell around her. But neither of us spoke of why we were out here in these hills, only what task was next.

After a time, I shook the men out of their oiled tarps to eat. Some did not wish to move, but I insisted. My boots squelched water as I moved around, getting them moving. We all ate, and I sent them all back to sleep. I'd take first regular watch. Nothing happened, and I woke the most senior of the 'recruits,' Clemph. Sometimes, he fell asleep, but Katriona and I could not take all the watches.

The next morning I awoke just before dawn, as ever, and it seemed the nighttime had been peaceful. Phillem was on watch now.

I discussed our food needs with Katriona, and gave her most of the money we'd acquired. Today would have to be dedicated to training for the rest of them while she bought our needed staples. She set off, and I set the others to drills and exercises. One drill flowed into another, in the comforting routine of training.

Also, I really didn't know where to go next. It seemed so clear, when I chose to come here, to find a way to do what the city refused. But now I feared I had been lying to myself. I had no plan, had charted no course, and was merely drifting, only reacting to the orcish actions.

We were slowly nibbling at the edges of the two orc tribes here, but we were not strong enough to take on more than a handful. And, strangely, they did not seem to be squabbling, as tribes this close should be. My troop of only eight, six of them barely trained. My men could not do much more, they would be swamped, and then dead.

She returned later with the staples. And I told her of our direction for tomorrow, a direction I would have been ashamed to admit was nearly random.

The next day, we set out, setting a wide course around where we believed the closer lair was. But it wasn't long until I heard the sound of some orcs over the sounds of the men a bit behind me. I waved the next man, Samab to hold position, and carefully moved forward. My chain had so many modifications, it made little noise anymore.

I saw some orcs, scouts I supposed, bleeding some mountain goats. It looked like these were not their first kills. I took a deep breath and attacked. Some of the orcs began to scream that epithet even as I crushed their bones with my hammer. Two were already down before I heard Katriona and the others arrive in a wave.

The next thing I knew, there were only orc bodies scattered on the ground. I pointed out the goat carcasses before doing a body count and any mercy kills. One had fled, but that was not too bad, it looked like these were Bonegnashers, this time. Katriona and I did the distasteful task of stripping the bodies for anything useful. A few coins, a few trinkets, a potion, and four goat carcasses. That would stretch our supplies. We piled the bodies, and then washed in a stream, walking in it for a while before changing direction.

After a time, we resumed our trudge to our next campsite. This one actually was a hidden cave with enough ventilation for us to dry most of the goat in strips for later use.

The next morning, I looked over the valley, and mist had filled it, making it look like a lake. It reminded me of the lake in the city where we'd pledged our hearts, but mine had been the only honest pledge.

For the thousand, thousandth time I wished I had spent more time out of the chapter house as my comrades had. I'd heard the lectures, and parables, and sermons of calm waters hiding dangerous shoals, or fair faces over evil hearts. But in my pride, I believed her implicitly, not noticing how she treated others or how people who knew her treated her. I went for her lies, and was dragged into the undertow. I hadn't, quite, done anything fully illegal. But I tried.

If it hadn't been for one of my few friends in the temple and his suspicions, I would never have learnt of her perfidity. A casual stroll with him, and I saw with whom her heart lay, along with her body. My friend canceled my duel with her betrothed when I fled the city, as she had been with one of the Nine. I heard later from my friend that her betrothed had killed her shortly after, while with yet another. By then I didn't care, as I was drowning in my grief, having lost first my love and then my grace.

After that, I was far more cautious, testing the waters before doing anything. I found Clemph, sick with grief at the burning shell of a farm where his family died. It was fifteen miles from here, but not far enough, and he begged to be taught fighting. Samab lost some fingers, his livelihood, and his mining partner. Phillem had been the apprentice to his uncle, an itinerant smith. Katriona, just appeared, saying she was the only survivor of a trading caravan. The rest washed up like driftwood, looking to me for direction and purpose. But many days I had nothing to give them but a chance of survival.

So we scouted, and harried, and waged our war of attrition. There had been three deaths, and I mourned them bitterly, resolving to take the brunt for these ill-equipped men who should have had protection from the city.

After a time, I discovered that the orcs had a word they called me, in most battles. They had named me a spirit, and it wasn't until Katriona had started discreetly buying supplies did I learn what it meant.

I was ashamed that even the orcs knew I was out of control, and adrift in these mountains.

But as I still didn't know what to do next, I watched the sun burn the mist off, and reentered the cave.

With the extra food, we could steer wider courses around the two clans. I was now almost certain where each clan was based, but we didn't have enough of a force to affect them.

We had a few more minor skirmishes, but then ran into a group that was too big. Samab was dead, and Katriona dying when we ran. I circled a bit with Phillem and laid her down when she was barely breathing and too, too pale.

I was afraid to, but I had to try.

I called upon Tyr, as I had not for so long, for healing.

Blue fire flared around my hands, and I heard Him say, _At last, my son._

As her injuries were healed, I cried a river of tears. Tears of joy, as what I had thought lost, was not.

Both she and Phillem were amazed as they knew nothing of my time before. But as the days passed, I realized her admiration was something a bit warmer. It became the unspoken truth we both tried to ignore. I was not going to take that road again, I would devote myself to Tyr's causes, like here at the Well. I plainly did not know how to make those kinds of choices.

I resumed my devotions, and with healing we could take on somewhat larger groups despite the loss of Samab. Even more now, they looked to me for direction. I, who had none.

But as much as I wanted to break the blockade around the Well, I knew too well it would be a waste of lives with this weak a force. Weeks passed, and aside from a couple scout groups, we had not seen much sign of the orcs. Something was building, and I almost fancied I smelt a stench coming from one or both of the orc lairs.

We moved outward a bit again to another cave we camped in, usually in the winter. I set Katriona to work on their training, and asked that I not be disturbed in a far back nook of the cave for at least two days. I was going to do a vigil.

This would be my first, in truly field conditions, and also my first since I finished my training. I also feared that I was not worthy enough for this blessing. But I would put my faith in his guidance, as I had none in my own.

Deep in the cave like this, there was only a breath of light from where they were, and I lost track of time completely. I prayed and meditated, asking for guidance. After what seemed forever, I felt a touch of his attention, and saw in a vision, a dark storm break on a gnarled and scarred tree on a cliff. But after the storm, the tree was still there.

Exhausted, and disheartened as I didn't understand the vision, I felt myself fall over to sleep. I'd so hoped He would give me direction, as I felt so lost and adrift.

I woke up on the ground and found my cloak over me and a waterskin by me. I felt tired, and very hungry. I sipped some of the water, and made my way out to the rest.

I could see it was daytime and a heavy rain made the whole sky dim.

"How long?" I asked.

Katriona said, "Over three days, though I don't know how long you slept. You were sleeping at least ten hours."

I said, "I'm sorry, but all I learned was that a dark storm is coming." I sighed. "Is there any food left?"

The next day we found another scout group. I was beginning to wonder how many scouts they could possibly have left. Though maybe that was why they were easier to kill than before.

A couple days later, we heard the sounds of combat, and closed. It was pretty much just us and the orcs outside the Old Owl Well, Caleb and his troops stayed close to the Well itself. I was hoping we'd see sign that the two tribes were finally fighting each other.

But this was a group of travelers. I signaled our attack, I didn't want more grieving victims on my conscience.

But they hadn't really needed our help, finishing off most of the orcs without us, fighting well.

They were an odd group, including an elf, a dwarf, and a tiefling. A small, almost forgotten part of me was expecting a punchline. But they cracked wise, and complained, and Tyr help me, talked to each other. And they looked to the other one, a woman, to speak for them. She had a purpose, and was the eye of the storm during the battle. She was the compass I sought in deep waters.

I walked up to her to speak.


End file.
